What Is Gaslighting? Understanding the Manipulation Behind Emotional Abuse

Gaslighting is a subtle but powerful form of psychological manipulation where someone causes another person to doubt their own reality, memory, or sanity. While the term comes from a 1938 play, today it’s widely used to describe toxic behavior in relationships, workplaces, and even public discourse.

How Gaslighting Works

Gaslighting often begins subtly, with the manipulator denying things they said or did, downplaying your feelings, or twisting facts to shift blame. Over time, this chips away at your confidence, making you question your perception of truth.

• Denial of reality: “That never happened.”
• Blame-shifting: “You’re too sensitive.”
• Trivializing: “You’re overreacting again.”
• Memory twisting: “You always remember it wrong.”

Psychological Impact

Victims of gaslighting often feel confused, anxious, isolated, and emotionally drained. Over time, they may feel like they’re going crazy or incapable of making decisions.

Common symptoms include:

• Loss of self-confidence
• Fear of speaking up
• Dependence on the gaslighter for validation
• Inability to trust one’s own thoughts and feelings

How to Defend Yourself

If you suspect gaslighting is happening to you:

• Document interactions: Keep notes or messages to verify facts.
• Set boundaries: Let them know what behavior is unacceptable.
• Seek support: Confide in a trusted friend or therapist.
• Educate yourself: Knowledge is the first line of defense.

Gaslighting in the Bible?

While the Bible doesn’t use the word “gaslighting,” it does warn about deception, pride, and manipulative speech. Proverbs 26:24-26 describes someone who hides hatred with lying lips. Jesus also called out gaslighting-like behavior from religious leaders who burdened others with rules they wouldn’t follow (Matthew 23).

Final Thoughts

Gaslighting is serious emotional abuse. You’re not overreacting. You’re not weak. You’re not crazy. Recognizing it is the first step to healing and reclaiming your voice.

“The truth will set you free.” — John 8:32